i'm leaving my cocoon tomorrow. i'll be back to clean it and say goodbye to the walls that hold many of my memories. hard words have been heard by them. they have witnessed devastated tears, joyful tears, and tears of absolutely pure love. they have seen me grow. they have seen me fail. they have seen me succeed. they have seen me. now they will see me leave.
this place was meant for me. it called me here and it enveloped me safely for almost exactly three years. if i could keep it, i would; but i guess it's time for it to cocoon someone else. there's a definite sadness in the air tonight as i lay down for one last time in this room. tomorrow they will take my things and soon after that, i will no longer have a key to this door.
i moved in here at twenty-one, victor's girl, employee of guaranty bank, very closed, very weary, very unsure. i'm leaving here twenty-four, my own girl, employee of saint edward's, very open, very weary, very sure of many unsure things, and very hopeful that as the cocoon opens and i let my wet wings unfold into the open air, i will be caught by a wild wind that takes me upward towards what only God knows i am ready for and capable of.
i want transformation in every sense. i want unfolding of every inch of my wingspan. this albatross wants to soar.
